Guiding the first conversation builds trust — and logging the call helps you follow through.
It’s 3:45 on a Tuesday.
The phone rings — again.
The person on the other end says, “I just need to know how much cremation costs.”
It would be easy to answer the question and move on to the next call.
But we all know: what a family asks first isn’t always what they need most.
Behind those questions, there’s often uncertainty. Grief. Guilt. Fear of making the wrong choice.
And what makes the difference — what truly builds trust — isn’t how fast we give the answer.
It’s how we show up in the conversation.
🕊 The First Call Is Your First Act of Care
I used to work with a fellow funeral director, Angela, who could connect with anyone. Even on a second call, she’d remember names, family dynamics, favorite meals — details I didn’t even think to ask. It was like she had known these families for years. She wasn’t rushing to explain pricing or process — she was listening.
That first phone call may be the only real interaction a family has with your team. Or it may be the beginning of a longer relationship.
Either way, the tone you set in those first few minutes shapes everything that comes next.
Families might say:
“I don’t know what I need. I’ve never done this before.”
“I’m just trying to figure out what’s involved.”
“We’re not ready yet. I’m just calling to get some information.”
In moments like these, jumping straight into logistics misses a critical opportunity: connection.
The best directors I’ve worked with don’t lead with details. They lead with care — and with questions.
💬 Ways to Invite Trust (Without a Script)
Here are a few ways you might open the door and guide the conversation:
- “Thank you for calling — my name is [Your Name]. May I ask who I’m speaking with today?”
- “Has the death already occurred, or are you planning ahead?”
- “Would it help if I explained how the process typically works, or are you mainly looking for pricing right now?”
- “Are there certain questions on your mind that I can help answer today?”
These aren’t about gathering information for your file.
They’re about creating space for the family to tell you what they really need.
⌛ What Happens When You Slow Down
One director shared with me that when they began asking families, “What feels most important to you right now?”, the calls changed completely.
Families who had started the call asking about price began sharing more about their loved one.
About what they were hoping for.
About the things they were afraid to admit they didn’t understand.
And here’s what they noticed: those families were more likely to follow through — not because they were “sold,” but because they felt heard.
📝 Log the Call — and Let Parting Pro Help You Follow Through
Now, I’ll be honest — I’m no Angela. I’ve always considered myself pretty personable, and I have a decent memory, but after a full day of calls, it all starts to blur together. At one point, I kept a yellow legal pad by the phone to jot down names and notes, but that got messy fast. I couldn’t keep track of who said what or when I needed to follow up.
That’s when I had a “duh” moment: I was already creating a case in Parting Pro to send a proposal — why not keep my notes there?
Back then, even when someone called “just for pricing,” I would ask for their name. I’d use it. I’d ask about their loved one. And when I followed up and referred to them by name, it told them something powerful:
I remember you.
And when families feel remembered, they feel cared for.
Logging the call and taking thoughtful notes isn’t just about staying organized — it’s about building trust. It helps your team stay consistent. It helps the family feel seen. And it turns what could have been a quick, forgettable exchange into a meaningful beginning.
With Parting Pro, it’s easy to make this your standard:
- ✅ Send the proposal email
- ✅ Save your notes about the call
- ✅ Set a follow-up reminder to check back in with the family
Because the real question families are asking isn’t just, How much does this cost?
It’s, Can I trust you to take care of the person I love?
And your answer starts with the first call.
📣 Want More on This Topic?
Join us for this month’s live AMA (Ask Me Anything), where we’ll dive deeper into how to lead the first call with care and confidence.
We’ll walk through:
- Real examples of what works (and what doesn’t)
- Tips for using scripts and templates without sounding scripted
- How to use Parting Pro to support great follow-up
Stay tuned for the invite — we’d love to hear your questions!